When it comes to sex, there’s a thin line between pleasure and greed. When the session is going well, things are flowing, you’re having a great time, you don’t want it to stop. You’re enjoying every hot, sweaty, moan filled moment. If you could, you’d freeze this moment in time and relive this moment over and over again. You’re enjoying the pleasure so much, you’re enjoying the moment so much, that you want to keep feeling that pleasure. But this is usually the moment when you forget all about your partner and their pleasure.
These moments happen often, and we’re all guilty of them. That moment when you feel like maybe your partner had enough pleasure and you say to yourself, “Time to get mine”. Or, maybe you just slip into deep pleasure, you feel ecstasy coming – literally – and you sacrifice your partners pleasure to reach that feeling. It’s a great moment. But its a great moment for you. You’ve crossed the bridge into greedy town.
Once you’ve made the decision to focus on yourself you’ve made a nasty decision. Once you’ve focused on pleasing yourself you’ve begun to neglect your partner. Which should probably never be the case during intimacy. It doesn’t matter what sexual act is happening, we should be focusing on pleasure being mutual. When both parties are focused on each other the sex flows and both are satisfied. When we focus on ourselves we often leave our partners less satisfied.
There’s a fine line between enjoying the moment, basking in it, and completely hogging the moment. Especially if you are doing so consciously. Being greedy during sex is something that happens often. However, if you can sacrifice a little bit of your own pleasure at that moment there’s usually a greater moment waiting for you. That moment of unified pleasure is where long lasting memories are. That’s where the story book endings are.
Imagine that this is the last time you will be intimate with this partner. Which it very well could be. Do you want their last memory of you to be one of greed? Do you want the last sec session you have with them to end with them feeling unsatisfied? How do you think that would look on your resume? Wouldn’t you want that last session to be a great memory for you both? This is why we have to remind ourselves to focus on our partner and not ourselves. This is why we have to remind ourselves not to be greedy.
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